- Joined
- Apr 1, 2005
- Messages
- 10,310
- Reaction score
- 6,261
I was originally going to post this in the Space Stuff thread but I think it's wacky enough to have a thread of its own. Pizzagate has nothing on this.
On the bright side, it won't be quite so easy for some fruit-loop with a gun to turn up looking for a non-existent basement:
NASA denies secret child sex slave cannibal colony on Mars
On the bright side, it won't be quite so easy for some fruit-loop with a gun to turn up looking for a non-existent basement:
NASA denies secret child sex slave cannibal colony on Mars
On Thursday, one of President Trump's favorite talking heads, Alex Jones, interviewed ex-CIA officer Robert David Steele during his radio show. Steele made some astonishing – think nuttier than squirrel crap – allegations of NASA covering up that humankind already has an outpost on the Mars. And that the alien world was red not just with oxidized iron dust but with the spilled blood of innocent youngsters snatched off the street and shipped into outer space.
"We actually believe that there is a colony on Mars that is populated by children who were kidnapped and sent into space on a 20-year ride. So that once they get to Mars they have no alternative but to be slaves on the Mars colony," Steele claimed. How exactly they are still children after 20 years of space travel wasn't, funnily enough, explained.
"Pedophilia does not stop with sodomizing children," the former g-man continued. "It goes straight into terrorizing them to adrenalize their blood and then murdering them. It also includes murdering them so that they can have their bone marrow harvested, as well as body parts."
Jones, whose conspiracy-nut web channel Infowars now has White House press credentials, agreed that bone marrow was "the original growth hormone," but stopped short of endorsing the idea of a Mars colony. He did, however, repeat his oft-touted assertion that there are plenty of alien "chimeras" right here on Earth.
He also opined that NASA's rovers on Mars and orbiters above the surface are turned off periodically to hide machinery operating on the planet's surface. Jones has many other Martian theories that NASA doesn't usually comment on, but the agency has now released a statement on these latest claims.
"There are no humans on Mars yet," NASA spokesman Guy Webster told El Reg last night, presumably restraining himself from adding" "I can't believe I have to answer this kind of stuff."